Saturday, 27 June 2009

Roads are not just for Cars

Whoever is out there taking all my awesome ideas and making them happen, here's a data point for your actuarial table of fucked-up sightings. Before yesterday, I'd have thought finding a dead body in a vacant lot would be much more likely than seeing a sober man taking a piss on a major street corner in the middle of the day. Now I am forced to reconsider.

At 2:30pm yesterday, completely out in the open on Canal Street, I saw a man taking a luxuriously long piss on a mailbox. This was no drunk guy, and this was no alleyway piss. He was on the corner of a major intersection, and I walked right by him. (In retrospect, I'm mad that I didn't go up to him and ask him for directions to something, just to eff with him.)

A few years ago, stopped in heavy traffic on Rte. 355 through downtown Rockville, I saw a businessman at a bus stop taking a lengthy piss against a fence, also in broad daylight. It was blatant! He was wearing a suit, and still had his briefcase in one hand! At the time, it was the best thing I'd ever seen.

On a slightly related note, the Onion A.V. club has an awesome interview with RZA from the Wu Tang Clan this week. In it, he says of ODB, "I think he represents a true free spirit. He's freedom. He don't give a fuck. He'll pull his car over in the middle of an expressway, stop traffic, and get out and take a piss. Is that American, or what? "